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12 Reasons NOT to read the 50 shades of Grey Trilogy

It is generally a terrible book overall

  • In case you haven’t already read the book this blog should hopefully save you about 80 hours of pure torture. YES, I said torture. Honestly, it took me months to read this. MONTHS.


The "50 Shades of Grey" book series has gained immense popularity since its release, sparking conversations and debates among readers worldwide. While some may argue that the books offer a thrilling and engaging narrative, there are several reasons why you may want to think twice before diving into this literary phenomenon. In this article, we will explore 12 compelling reasons why it may be best to steer clear of the "50 Shades of Grey" books.

Spoiler: summary of the book

The characters:

  1. Christian Grey: He's an extremely handsome hero, and multi-billionaire, knows how to fly a chopper, great physique, plays the piano and has extreme business skills. And he's 27 with a huge dick. He is so handsome that every woman who looks at him gasps.

  2. Anastasia Steele: The heroine is a college student, average-looking, dorky, with low self-esteem, and is a doormat for the hero. Nothing is exciting about her.

  3. Kate Kavanagh: The beautiful confident level headed friend of Anastasia. She is supposed to interview Grey but sends her dumb friend Anastasia instead. The only sensible convo in the entire book comes from Kate. Loved Kate

Let's look at the ludicrous stuff that happens;

  1. Extremely handsome Christian is immediately attracted to the average and dumb Ana. He asks her to be in a BDSM relationship under contract. He is excited because she's a virgin and she says "Yes Sir" when they meet. Oh, she also looks like Christian Grey's mother who was a drug addict and Christian loves to beat women who look like her.

  2. Many attractive girls try to flirt with Christian throughout the books but he has eyes only for the dumb average Ana. That's laugh-worthy.

  3. Ana has no email, flip phone, or laptop and no plans for her future during the last week of college. She is a virgin.

  4. They were engaged after 39 days and married after 81 days and

It's a series about two idiots, one of them being a misogynist, psychopathic man-child with no real redeeming qualities other than he's rich, written by someone who doesn't know the difference between BDSM and actual abuse, and the other being an enabling, pathetically weak vacuum of personality with no sense of responsibility or concept for how to even function in the real world. How these two could be remotely fit parents is shocking to me and I don't have any children. They just needed the story to end. How three books were written on this shit is a literal miracle

1. The timeline is insane

50 shades of grey


  • 9/5/2011 - Anna meets Christian - DAY 1

  • 21/5/2011 - Christian tells Ana he's into BDSM and they have sex - DAY 12

  • 4/6/2011 - Ana is in love with Christian and then they break up because he beat the shit out of her - DAY 26


  • 9/6/2011 - They get back together and Ana has somehow lost a LOT of weight - it's been like 5 days - DAY 31

  • 14/6/2011 - Christian proposes - DAY 36

  • 17/6/2011 - Ana accepts the proposal - DAY 39


  • 29/7/2011 -31/7/11 - They get married - DAY 81-83

  • 31/7/2011 - They go on their honeymoon for about a month - DAY 86-106

  • 13/9/2011 - Anna is pregnant - DAY 129

  • 21/9/2011 -The book ends - DAY 137

2. The problematic portrayal of relationships in 50 shades

in the "50 Shades of Grey" books has raised concerns among critics and readers alike. The dynamics between the main characters, Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey, are often characterised by control, manipulation, and power imbalance. Such themes can romanticise unhealthy behaviours and send troubling messages about what constitutes a healthy relationship. By consuming content that glorifies these dynamics, readers may unknowingly reinforce misconceptions about love and consent. It is crucial to critically assess the representation of relationships in literature and consider how they may impact our understanding of healthy partnerships.

3. Too many unnecessary sex scenes with the same couple.

I honestly had to skip some of these. I was repetitive and I was so tired of the goddess thing. It almost felt as though she had to have sex with him to keep him in case he wanted to beat the living daylights out of her. I get this is like some fantasy erotic pornographic sex book but it was too much.

4. Misrepresentation of BDSM culture

The portrayal of BDSM culture in the "50 Shades of Grey" books has been a point of contention for many within the BDSM community. Critics argue that the books inaccurately depict BDSM practices, focusing more on control and manipulation rather than the key tenets of consent, trust, and communication. This misrepresentation can perpetuate harmful stereotypes and misconceptions about BDSM, leading to a misunderstanding of this consensual lifestyle. It is important to seek out accurate and respectful representations of alternative lifestyles to foster understanding and respect for diverse communities.

5. Anna is a terrible and annoying character

Anna goes on and on and on about her inner goddess. It's so utterly frustrating and extremely pointless. The writer also makes the mistake of taking us all in and overly describing her inner dialogue. She gets upset and cries when he goes to work. I mean that guy runs a multibillionaire company. She's exhaustingly annoying. Other characters talk about how smart she is when she's an idiot. She sleeps with a man who wants to beat her. She listens to everything she says with minor defiance. She then breaks up with him and they get back together within a week. She almost dies because of his crazy exes. She learns that he wants to beat her because she looks like her mother. She engages the man after 39 days and marries him in 81 days. She forgets to to take her contraceptive injection for weeks, yes weeks and then gets pregnant. She tries to steal money from Christian's account to help her kidnapped sister-in-law. Oh her sister-in-law was kidnapped by her ex-boss who was fired by Christian after trying to flirt with Anna. Oh, and it turns out her ex-box was in an orphanage with Christian when they were children and he was angry at Christian because he felt that his life should have been his. Furthermore, she is insecure, indecisive and just extremely childish.

6. Poorly written content

Another reason to steer clear of the "50 Shades of Grey" books is the poor quality of writing. Many readers and critics alike have pointed out the lacklustre prose, clichés, and repetitive language present throughout the series. The books have been criticised for their amateurish writing style and lack of literary merit, which can make for a frustrating reading experience. Delving into books with subpar writing may not be a fulfilling or enriching endeavour for those seeking well-crafted literature. Choosing to read works of higher quality can offer a more rewarding and intellectually stimulating experience.

7. Lack of character development

Lack of character development is another significant drawback of the "50 Shades of Grey" series. Critics have often highlighted the one-dimensional nature of the characters, particularly the protagonist, Anastasia Steele, and Christian Grey. The character arcs are often stagnant, lacking depth and complexity, which can make it challenging for readers to connect with or empathise with them. Engaging with well-developed characters is crucial for a fulfilling reading experience, as they drive the narrative and allow readers to form emotional attachments. Opting for books with more nuanced character development can provide a more immersive and satisfying literary journey.

8. 50 Shades has Unrealistic expectations set for readers

Another reason to reconsider delving into the "50 Shades of Grey" books is the unrealistic expectations they may set for readers. The portrayal of relationships in the series often romanticises possessive and controlling behaviours, presenting them as desirable qualities in a partner. This can perpetuate harmful stereotypes and misconceptions about healthy relationships. Choosing literature that promotes genuine respect, communication, and equality in relationships can offer a more realistic and positive perspective for readers seeking inspiration and guidance in their personal lives. Prioritising literature that aligns with healthy relationship dynamics can contribute to a more informed and mindful reading experience.

The "50 Shades of Grey" books have been criticised for glamorising unhealthy power dynamics, dubious consent, and questionable moral choices. Engaging with content that blurs the lines between consent and coercion can potentially desensitise readers to troubling behaviours and attitudes. Consuming literature that upholds ethical standards and promotes positive values can help cultivate a more discerning and principled worldview. Prioritising reading material that aligns with your values and fosters moral reflection can lead to a more enriching and morally sound literary experience. Embracing narratives that uphold integrity and ethical behaviour can contribute to a more ethically grounded and conscientious reading journey.

9. Graphic and explicit content may be triggering for some readers

. The graphic depictions of intimate encounters in the "50 Shades of Grey" books may be distressing or triggering for individuals who have experienced trauma or have sensitivities to such content. Engaging with material that elicits negative emotions or exacerbates past trauma can be detrimental to mental health and well-being. Prioritising literature that respects boundaries and provides a safe reading experience is crucial for fostering a healthy relationship with reading. It is important to prioritize self-care and emotional well-being when selecting reading material to avoid potential harm or discomfort.

10. Better quality literature available on similar topics

While "50 Shades of Grey" gained popularity, there are numerous other books that explore themes of love, desire, and relationships with more depth and nuanced storytelling. Literary works by acclaimed authors provide a richer and more profound exploration of intimate relationships without resorting to sensationalism or graphic content. Choosing to read books that present complex characters, engaging plots, and thought-provoking themes can offer a more fulfilling reading experience. Exploring alternative literature on similar topics can broaden perspectives and expose readers to diverse writing styles and voices. Invest in books that not only entertain but also enrich the mind and evoke reflection.

50 shades of grey

11. The books are way too long

  1. 50 Shades of Grey: First book - 560 pages - 19 hours and 48 minutes on audible

  2. 50 Shades Darker: Second book - 532 pages - 19 hours and 49 minutes on audible

  3. 50 Shades Freed: Third book - 572 - 20 hours and 59 minutes on audible

YES, they get longer and longer somehow.

12. Honestly just watch the movies

The movies are quicker, they don't require you to listen to Anna and if anything you don't understand please just Google it. I regret this book so much.

  1. 50 Shades of Grey: First book - 2 hours and 5 minutes

  2. 50 Shades Darker: Second book - 1 hour and 58 minutes

  3. 50 Shades Freed: Third book - 1 hour and 49 minutes

Missed opportunities by the writer

  1. At the end of book one Anna breaks up with Christians after he savagely beats her and she comes to her senses and leaves. However in less than a week in book two, they are back together and Christian is suddenly a different man and no longer has the desire to beat women that look like his mother. Reading this I was so annoyed by E.L. James because why not allow Anna to finally explore her sexuality? Why not allow her to date someone with no money? Someone her age. Someone who was not severely traumatised. Instead, she has the shortest breakup and has to deal with a man-child who is extremely controlling.

  2. We could have explored other characters having sex. It was so boring reading the same-sex scene on every other page. There was a clear opportunity for Anna and Christian to break up and we could have managed to get a better understanding of his BDSM side and Ana becoming sexually empowered by dating others.

  3. Understanding Christian: After finishing the book I realised there were three further books. They were bigger than the first three and I listened to them rather than read them cause I was so done but all the reviews stated that they were better.

  4. Allowing Ana to explore her marriage before getting knocked up ASAP

  5. The voice of Kate - Kate is such an interesting character and the voice of reason and it would have been interesting to see her helping Ana.

  6. The actual planning of her wedding and what others thought of this including family.

  7. Christian as a father

  8. Elena's side


Remember, every book we choose to read is a vote for the kind of literary world we want to see. Let's continue to seek out and celebrate literature that promotes inclusivity, authenticity, and diverse perspectives to create a more representative and understanding society.

JUST WATCH THE MOVIES - The books are so shit.

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This Blog focuses on the life of a junior doctor working for the NHS as well some interesting topics on organisation, books and christianity.


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